It’s Wednesday… Let the Crazy People Run FREE!

Did someone let the nutter bus loose today? Was the local asylum giving out day passes? We had some delightful numbskulls today getting in fights on speakerphone in the waiting room, and an amusing man wearing a New York Times badge that was having difficulty hearing on his phone. Of course when you have difficulty hearing, the only solution is to stick your finger in your ear, find the nearest corner, and go stand facing the corner while resting your head against the wall for support. Can you hear me now?

screamer
I like to read and mumble. And then get on my speaker phone and get into arguments, which I am sure everyone loves to hear!

questionableboots
I can’t stand some people’s UGGly boots, but there are some that just make no sense to me at all. These boots are so hairy it looks like an old, brown poodle died on each of your feet.

santaclaus
Every time Santa Claus Man treks up the stairs at Goldens Bridge, he thinks in his mind, ‘I can reach the unreachable star!’ because just going up a flight of stairs when you are that drunk might as well be climbing Mount Everest.

sleeperkid
Ah, good old Sleeper Kid. I have to give him credit, at least he isn’t trying to eat and sleep at the same time any more.

I have no pictures for this one, so instead, I will leave you with a story:
This week marks the return of this rather large and obnoxious woman. She rode the shuttle bus last year, and then all of a sudden disappeared. Honestly, I had hoped she got fired. I guess she didn’t, because now she is back. Maybe she just rides the bus in the winter for some odd reason. I don’t really know. Either way, she is dead set about being the first person to get on the bus. She can and will push aside any other person in her way to be the first person on the bus. As witnessed this evening, if she is sitting in a seat and there is another open seat right next to her, her fat ass is not moving an inch. Our building complex now has two shuttle buses, but for the longest time we had only one. Before we got the second bus, extra people would have to stand in the aisles if there were not enough seats. Now that we have two buses, people that don’t fit in the seats on the first bus are required to wait five minutes or so for the other bus to come around. Tonight there was an extra seat on our bus, but because fat ass didn’t want to move her butt, that person had to stand in the bitter cold until the other bus came around. And then she had the audacity to laugh about how cold it was outside, and that she couldn’t have waited another minute out there. When someone said to her that there was one more seat, she said, “Who gon’ fit dere?” If someone can’t fit there next to your fat butt, maybe that is your cue to go on a diet? For the record, as I am sure I will get a flame from someone about that, I do not have a problem with fat people, but I do have a problem with assholes.

Read More

Attention all female train conductors…

Female train conductors… boy does Craigslist have a deal for you! Do you have “fantasies” of sex on the train? Apparently there is one man who does, and he wants the world to know!

I am sure that there is one woman conductor out there that would like to fool around on metro north train, and live out a fantasy,i will be taking the 6:46 tomorrow morning from ossing and the 5:56 this evening, would love to orally please a woman, hispanic male 5;4 stocky build, d& d free

This was my amusement of the morning, since I have google alerts set up to email me when new websites and news articles are posted about Metro-North and the Harlem Line. I doubt this desperate guy is going to get any, but I have no illusions, I’m certain people have done this on the train before.

In other news, the delightful Santa Claus man, the resident drunk of Goldens Bridge station, had a little bit of an “issue” the other night. His pants were, well, they were soaked. In a drunken stupor he pissed himself. So here’s a little expert tip for you: don’t sit on the benches at the station.

Other than that, this has been a pretty much uneventful week… enjoy the rest of it!

Read More