I think it is about time that I reclassify the person I refer to as Johnny as one of the White Plains waiting room crazies. I’ve mentioned him before, and that although I’ve seen him smoke with some of the other crazy people, he wasn’t doing anything to really classify himself along with those people. After some of the recent incidents in the waiting room, I have to change my mind. Shouting “fear the deer!” at everyone passing by is a bit odd, but maybe the Bucks won the night before, so I could somewhat understand it. After that he began squawking like a bird, “Fuck you!” to all of the people passing by. A few people looked as if they wanted to punch him, which certainly would have made for some great waiting room video, but a fight never did break out. When he got tired of that, he started talking to nobody in particular how there was a really obnoxious lady on his train that was talking on her cell and wouldn’t shut up. He mimed holding a phone, and kept going “Blah, blah, blah…” over and over. Sir, I agree she was probably annoying, but you are as well, if not even more annoying than she.

I suppose Johnny got tired of all of that, and decided to do something different with his time: hit on ladies in the waiting room. When it was clear that just shouting out “Hey Baby!” was getting him nowhere, he tried a different tact. He went up to the women, and pretended like he knew them. “Don’t you remember me?” It was obvious to everyone else in the waiting room that he didn’t know any of these women. Because as one would pass by, he used the same line on the next. And the next. This is not the first time I’ve witnessed crazy guys attempting to hit on women in this way on the train. Except of course that incident was on the subway, the man later gave up on pursuing women, and he then proceeded to unzipper his pants and pee out the door of the moving train. Is this a common way that guys attempt to pick up girls in the city? Or is it just reserved for the crazies?

A few days later, also in the waiting room in White Plains, I heard crying. Or what I thought was crying. Curious, I looked over to see what was going on. It was not a person crying, it was in fact a small dog, whimpering. The lady who owned the dog told everyone that she was probably scared of all the people, and apologized. I like dogs. Every time I see them on the train, I want to pet them. Or take pictures of them…

This is the dog. I believe her name was Gigi (and hopefully not Gigli). Gigi looks quite similar to my sister’s dog, whom I’ve dubbed Shittles. Living up to his name, one day Shittles fell in the toilet. This caption has little relevance to the story.

I know I have mentioned this subject before, but what do you think about dogs riding Metro-North? (Mind you, I am talking about pet animals, and not service or helping animals of any kind) Of the various MTA agencies, it seems that Metro-North has the more lenient policy when it comes to animals. Long Island Rail Road, as well as New York City Transit (subway and bus) policy is as follows:

Small domestic pets are permitted provided they are carried in kennels or similar containers that can be accommodated by you on your lap without annoyance to other passengers.

Metro-North’s policy contains a little addition…

Small domestic pets are permitted provided they’re carried in kennels or similar containers, or are securely controlled on leashes throughout the trip and do not annoy other customers. Pets should not occupy seats and are subject to approval by the conductor.

Perhaps that is what annoys me about dogs on Metro-North. The leash thing. I like dogs, really, I do. But I hate seeing dogs on leashes being led through the aisles of the train. Or laying and blocking the aisle of the train. Even if the dog was not in any sort of crate, but the owner held the dog while walking, I would find this more acceptable. And I do find it rather bothersome when a person with a small dog on a leash exits the train. There is that little gap that we hear so much about. I know dogs can do tricks and jump over stuff and all, but I do fear that your little chihuahua might not be able to handle it, and that he’s going to fall in the gap. After all, if it were a small child, you’d certainly be holding their hand while stepping over that gap. Why not just pick that dog up?

I am curious what other folks think about dogs on Metro-North. I don’t think I am really annoyed by them, but I do worry about their safety on the train. Should Metro-North be more strict are require them to stay in kennels, like the LIRR? I do recall seeing a woman with a cat in a baby carriage… which is more safe than by leash, I suppose.

Yesterday was a pretty great day. On the platform in White Plains at around 5:45, the sun was shining. And all the riders that had formerly been hidden in waiting rooms and other dark places, came out to enjoy the sunlight. I was seriously amazed at how many people were out and about. Of course I had to take pictures.

I also passed out a bunch of cards. At times this was really hard for me. I’m not exactly sure what people think I am like based on what I say in this blog, but I can be incredibly shy at times. When you ride on the train you have a routine. I take the same train, and generally sit in the same seat. And you cross paths with other folks that also have routines. When I see these people often, it isn’t too hard to just go up to them and have a chat. But just going up completely cold, to a person I’ve never seen before, and handing them a card. Well it is a little hard. I was deathly afraid someone was going to totally reject me. I will admit I got a lot of funny looks. But there were also people that really enjoyed it. I even encountered the guy who runs the site TrainJotting and gave him a card. This is only the second time that I’ve been recognized by someone because of my blog. Too funny.

As for this morning, it was a little bit chilly, but it is supposed to be another good day. I haven’t seen any St. Patrick’s drunks yet, but I expect to see that tonight. I did, however, see the guy I refer to as Johnny. He was standing in front of the White Plains station and kept asking people walking in and out whether they wanted to see a baby hawk. He kept pointing. “It’s right there, look!” He pointed to the area over the door where the pigeons enjoy roosting. I only saw pigeons, no hawks. I figured he was joking, because after that he said, “There is a leprechaun up there too! And he was this tall,” as he motions to show that the aforementioned leprechaun was about a foot in height. I got Johnny to produce this amateur sketch:

If you happen to see the leprechaun, please let me know.

Around this time of year, the waiting room in White Plains is packed. Nobody wants to wait outside in this cold. And if you like people watching, it is the spot to be. The current “thing” to do is smoke inside. Who wants to smoke outside in the cold? The best way to perform this maneuver is to hide against the wall or window, in an attempt to block anyone from seeing your pipe or cigarette. Nasty smelling chewing tobacco is also popular. Be sure to pull a hood up over yourself and lean over, so nobody can really see what you’re doing.

Nope! Can’t see me! (though we can smell you)

Earlier this morning I saw Johnny walking through the waiting room with a cigarette in hand. Johnny (which is just my nickname for him) is an interesting character. I wouldn’t group him in with some of the other crazies at the station, he seems relatively normal, but he does hang out and smoke with the crazies. And tries to have conversations with them. Which can be interesting, since most of these people are used to only talking to themselves. When not smoking, he also likes to sing. His mind does not retain lyrics well, however, which is where his nickname came about. One amusing morning he kept attempting to sing Johnny B Goode, but after a few words just went back to singing “Go go, Go Johnny go, Go!” over and over again.

Crazy coat guy was hanging about the waiting room yesterday too. With the blue purse. And a questionable looking chain around his neck. Honest to God, I think he stole a hood ornament off of a car, and put it around his neck.

John the dollar man was in the waiting room last night, being questioned by police. And he looked as if he were about to cry. A friend of mine said she actually saw him on a train from Grand Central, walking up the aisle and asking for dollars. It was only a matter of time before somebody complained. Plus White Plains always tends to have a decent size contingent of police officers. And occasionally K-9′s that are probably ready to take a bite out of your leg.

That is about it for crazy stories from the waiting room for today… though I realized that I never mentioned anything about the new year. Honestly I am not much of a fan of holidays. But as the decade came to a close, I thought about some of the “commuting memories” I had of the decade. There were two that stuck out in my mind. Wesley Autrey, the man that saved another man that fell on the subway tracks, and Edwin Gallart, the guy who lost his phone down a Metro-North toilet, and got his arm stuck attempting to retrieve it. Anyone else have any “commuting memories” from the decade? Comment or tweet…

Ah, White Plains train station, you have the most interesting of people. I think all the rain we’ve been having lately has been stressing people out. The other day the taxis couldn’t seem to do anything other than honk their horns loudly at each other, prompting a rather unkempt looking man sitting on the benches to scream out, “SHUT THE HELL UP!”

Do you know what calmed that man down? Another strange man wanders over, singing “I’m here to save the day!” He sat next to the other man, and they began a conversation. The two of them, certainly a match made in heaven.

Another guy I tend to see at the train station is a man that despite the warm temperature, is always wearing a winter coat. He also gets into very animated conversations with himself. He does keep to himself, and doesn’t bother anyone, so that is always a good thing. While sitting around waiting for my bus the other day I watched him play a game with himself. I’m not quite sure what the rules of this game were, if there were any at all. But he had a handfull of coins that he would shake in his hand, as if he were about to roll some dice. Then he would throw the coins to the ground, count them, and then start the process again.

For all the crazies I see at White Plains, I’ve been told that the real crazies hang out on the trains to Wassaic. Apparently a man felt it necessary to use the train to take a patio bar set somewhere. And not in a box or anything like that. In pieces. When the train doors opened he brought one piece in, then went back out to pick up another piece, and then another. And during the winter, another passenger on the Wassaic train decided to to transport a snowblower. A gas reeking snowblower. Oh the intriguing people you see on trains…

Just as a last note, I know I mentioned once before seeing a lady that carried a clipboard, and I speculated as to what the clipboard was for, and what she was making notes of. Now I am not sure if this particular woman was in fact making notes for Metro North, but I noticed a young man on my train, every single day, carrying a clipboard and walking through the train cars making notes. After watching this for quite a while, I asked… apparently there are people with clipboards that make notes about train car temperatures or things like that. I figured I’d write that since I actually saw that some people found the blog by typing into a search engine mta what do clipboards people do. Apparently other people have typed in why do pigeons scream in the morning and ride the train sex, but I have nothing to say about that.